As a woman, it is unfortunate to think that my man doesn’t trust me, even when I insist that I love him and would never step out on him—which I won’t. And he too can stress that he would never cheat on me—which I hope he doesn’t.
But promises can only take us so far. Some things need a measure beyond a mere assurance. Sometimes you have to know for sure.
What am I getting at here?
There is a certain stigma attached to the DNA test when performed on a child at the behest of a mother or father, sometimes both, who are unsure about the child’s paternity. The DNA test can confirm beyond a shadow of a doubt who is, or is not, the father.
Since as long as I can remember, Maury Povich has made millions of dollars off of this very concept. The talk show is sensational, I admit. But it digs at the heart of a painful matter.
All parties benefit from knowing the biological parents, for the child’s sake and for the sanity of the adults in question. If and when there is any doubt, the DNA test is imperative to avoid an awkward and possibly devastating situation.
If you don’t believe me, this week’s episode of Black Ink Crew (302) will convince you otherwise.
As if O’S**t isn’t already in a lot of S**t, he luckily slides out of a possible jail stint for possession of an uncontrolled substance with one day of community service and a 120 dollar fine.
For some time now, he has constantly been trying to get in touch with his baby momma #1—not the one he likes the most, but only #1 in order of birth—the feisty Puerto Rican Kathy, except Kathy is deliberately keeping her son from him. O’S**t can’t understand why.
Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Kathy, O’S**t did some detective work of his own and performed a home paternity test on his son. The results revealed that he was NOT the father.
For so long, he’s put up with all her yelling, screaming, and wineglass throwing—that ratchetness reality divas have turned into an amateur sport.
Despite the negative DNA match, O’S**t says he still wants to be in the boy’s life as his father, since he’s been around for 8 years, the boy’s whole life thus far, and we can only guess how traumatic it would be for a kid to have his father abruptly change, whether biological or not, at that age. That’s really big of O’S**t to want to man up when everybody always clowns him for being immature.
And perhaps Kathy can calm down with her nagging since he’s not her baby’s father. It’s probably that she has been looking at the kid lately, and he looks less and less like O’S**t now that he’s growing up, so she doesn’t want to bring him around.
It seems all this confusion could have been avoided with a simple DNA test in the early years of the kid’s life. That’s at least what O’S**t’s friends told him to do. They never trusted that Kathy was faithful to him. They actually knew for a fact that she was sleeping around, but he took her word at face value and blindly, albeit foolishly, trusted when she said the child was definitely his.
I’m usually on the side of the woman’s word and vote against being critical of who she says could or could not be her baby’s father. But after this situation, and others that I have witnessed in that school of hard knocks called life, I can’t fault a guy for asking for the test. Even my guy. He has a right to know for sure.
And if you as a woman have any doubt, you should want to know too.
Small lies tumble into massive webs. The Black Ink Crew DNA test showed that sometimes precautions are necessary if you want to reach the truth.
Avoid the conflict, the hurt, and the shame. If you’re not sure, take the DNA test. I would.
Do it for your man, yourself, and most importantly, for the kids.